You should all be reading Melissa's books. That's right. You. And you. And especially you, you punk.
But today, we're talking about one in particular: THE BIG KEEP.
Who the hell am I even talking about? Well, I'll let her introduce herself in the style you've all become so accustomed to.
- My name is Melissa F. Olson. I promise this is the least interesting point in my bulleted list.
- Neil is my friend. Well, he’s my Facebook friend, which is like a different classification of friendship, but I’d like to think that if we met in person we’d ultimately become such good friends that we’d always know exactly when the other person wanted a high-five. [Neil's note: Sure, except I don't high-five. I leave you hanging.]
- Things Neil and I have in common: we both write. In fact, we both write crime fiction (in the past I’ve published urban fantasy novels, but my first mystery came out on Tuesday). We both love television (currently I’m very into Suits, and my summer guilty pleasure is The Last Ship). We both have a love for our dogs that borders on unhealthy. We both think bullet point lists are a rad and valid way to communicate. [Neil's note: I use bullets because I'm lazy.]
- Ways in which Neil and I are different: I have two kids. I have a backup auxiliary dog that came in a package deal with my husband. I live in the glorious city of Madison, WI. I have not, as yet, experienced a heart attack. [Neil's note: I don't recommend the heart attack. Too much work.]
- I also have a degree in film from USC, and I use it as much as possible to win arguments about movies. Okay, I try not to whip out my film degree card to win arguments about movies, but I can’t say I’m above it, either. [Neil's note: I have a PhD in English, but I only use the title "Doctor" when I'm complaining to an airline for shitty treatment. It doesn't work as well anymore.]
- I was a high school overachiever, the repercussions of which cause me to make stupid decisions like writing, editing, and promoting three different series books with three different protagonists at the same time while simultaneously teaching at a technical college and raising children. So that’s my summer.
- If I could have the career of any writer alive, it would be Dennis Lehane. Or Kelley Armstrong. Or Jim Butcher. I may have too many idols. [Neil's note: For me, Donald Hamilton.]
- My greatest vice (some would say my only vice, but they haven’t seen me ignore my children for Plants vs. Zombies 2) is Diet Coke. I know it’s bad for me. I know I will eventually regret having drank so much of it. It’s just that I don’t have it in me to care.
- I hope you’ll read and enjoy my new detective novel, The Big Keep. It’s about a P.I. who learns that she’s unexpectedly pregnant the same day she takes on a dangerous new case. If that sounds too girly to you, please know that there are many testosterone-friendly qualities as well, such as guns, boxing, a comic book store, and testicular cancer. [Neil's note: You had me at "testicular."]
- I didn’t really have anything else to add; I just didn’t want to end on “testicular cancer.” Oh, crap, I did it anyway.
Now you know! So get off your duffs and BUY THIS NOW.